Duran and Duran. Singers. Often sited for breaking up royal marriage.

Jamie Campbell Bower.** Englishman.

David Cassidy. Musician. Former teen idol who hasn't debased self on reality show. "Dahling, in the `70s, I was bigger than Fran Lebowitz. I shit you not."

Jim Peterik. Musician. Grammy award winning songwriter. Sang, wrote or co-wrote such hits as "Vehicle" (Ides of March), "Eye of the Tiger" (Survivor) and stuff for .38 Special. Considers personal life just that. Shares colorist Kim Vo with Ms. Spears

Sir Tom Stoppard. Playwright. Academy Award winning screenwriter. Critic. When knighted was cited by Queen for contributions to Elton John's "Honky Cat."

Mark-Paul Gosselaar. Child actor. Grown up actor. Producing and directing all-women version of "The Longest Yard" at the Sierra Madre Playhouse, Sierra Madre, CA. (Tickets available)

Gino Vannelli. Singer. Musician. Canadian sex symbol (Toronto Star). Since 1985, lives outside Lake Arrowhead, CA, with life partner, only leaving the area to go to REI and judge karaoke competitions.

Dana Carvey. Comic. Actor. Drummer. Gifted impersonator, particularly of the less impulsive and reckless President Bush. Retired to Bay Area to open a canine companion shop catering exclusively to female dogs.

ChrisWalla** Musician. Songwriter. Producer. Former DJ. OMG! I got tickets to Ellen!

Robyn Hitchcock. Musician. Artist. Egyptologist. Runs a non profit promoting and suporting young women who want to work in Silicon Valley IT fields.

Rick Astley.** Singer. Former Vh-1 favorite. Thinks sexual orienation would shock parents. But they know.

John Fogerty. Musician. Songwriter. Parent of fortunate sons and daughters. Thinks war is bad. Member of 1950s rockabilly legends the Bakersfield Girls.

Alan Colmes. Comic turned political commentator. Former nun.

Tommy Tune. Dancer. Choreographer. Director. Tallest person ever to win nine Tonys. Like Don King, reportedly killed a man during a fist fight in Cleveland.

Keith Richards. Musician. Songwriter. Guitarist. One half of the Glimmer Twins. Ambulatory cadaver. Member of the way cooler of those two bands from the `60s.

Jim Carroll. Poet. Musician. Writer. Believe it or not, one of the ones who lived. In fifty plus years, claims to have knitted more than 6,500 hats and scarves for nieces, nephews and coworkers.

Tuck Andress (of Tuck and Patti). Musician. One day, Tuck will look in the mirror and think, "man. What am I thinking."

Siegfried. Along with Roy, professional magician, less successful animal trainer. The target of Jay Leno jokes dating back to 1977 (Mr. Leno thinks they are gay.). Somehow, the jokes always remain fresh.

John Oates. Musician. Half of 1970s/80s muscial duo Seals and Crofts. Fork lift operator in Campbell Soup factory in Camden, New Jersey.

Noel Fielding. English comic and actor. Seen here leaving rehersal of one-women show: "Erotica: A Midwife's Tale."

Daniel Day-Lewis. Actor. Academy Award winner. Crazy Irish guy.

Doug McIntyre. Sitcom/TV writer turned conservative radio talk show host. Or maybe it's the othe way around. Claims to have started every show with goofy dancing long before Ellen.

Al Jarreau. Singer. Winner of gazzillion* Grammys. Someone help me out here: what exactly does he sing? Is it okay to like it? If I do like it, do I have to like it in an ironic, Diablo Cody way, or can I just like it?

Rick Springfield. Musician. Jessie's girl.

John Mayer. Chameleon-like musician. First celebrity to suffer from the "Jessica Jinx." Welding artist.

Adam Curry. Former MTV VJ and current Ron Paul supporter who lives in the Netherlands (or some place like that).Successfully sued Dutch Women's Volleyball Assn. for demanding tests of testosterone levels.

Couple!

Michael Lington and Brian Culbertson. Smooth and/or light jazz musicians. Eliminated in first round of "Amazing Race 4" when Lington decked a Turkish cab driver for believing he made snide remark about couple's relationship.

Hal Holbrook. Award winning actor. Mark Twain impersonator. Recently moved to assisted living home in Lowell, Mass., after overheard telling a great grand child, "It's nobody's goddamn business who I have sex with!"

Bruno Gelber. Pianist. Argentinean. Musical director for Peaches.

Happy St. Valentine's Day from all our "Men Who Look Like Old Lesbians" couples--and one threesome!

Richard Marx. Singer. Songwriter. Overwrought balladeer. (Think Bryan Adams with better skin.) Long time trainer of University of Maryland women's lacrosse team. Go Terps!

a favor, if possible...

the following individual stole this blog and put it up on youtube as his own--and added crappy music. if you could let him know this is not a cool thing to do, it would be much appreciated. thank you. keith http://youtube.com/user/raphlo2 p.s. i asked him to take it down, and he blocked me from e-mailing him. i'm starting to question his ethics.

Carl Bernstein. Reporter. Author. Political analyst. Played by Dustin Hoffman in 1976's "All The President's Men," a role revived in 2006 failed musical vesion by John Goodman.

Jackson Browne. Singer/songwriter. Eagles enabler. Teaches Women's Lit. at Pasadena Community College and has self-published collection of poems, "My Two Vaginas."

Colin Hay. Muscian. Lead singer with popular `80s band "Men at Work." Drives airport shuttle bus in Melbourne.

Couple!!!

Corey Feldman and Corey Haim. Teen actors turn reality TV stars. Feldman is seeking a return to acting while Hiam is in the process of opening a Harley-Davidson repair shop catering to women near Bakersfield, California.

Rick Derringer. Guitarist. Singer/songwriter. Along with solo career, played with Winter brothers (Johnny, Edger and Jonathan), Steely Dan and Bette Midler. Hold's world record for number of times playing "Hang on Sloopy."

Peter Mayhew. Character actor. Former British citizen. Played an alien in "Star Wars" films. Or maybe it was "Star Trek" movies.

Little Richard. Singer. Songwriter. Piano player. Accurately claims to be architect of rock and roll. Ordained minister. Affable crazy person

Van Morrison. Irish singer. Songwriter. Has had hits going back to the 1960s. Them were the days...

John Daly (pictured here during workout). Golfer. Guard for Alabama Renegades of NWFA (National Women's Football Assn.).

Penn Jillette. Magician. Comic. Writer. Rumored to call himself a Libertarian because he thinks it makes him sound smarter. Has been with same partner for more than two decades.

Robbie Robertson. Musician. Songwriter. Canadian. Native American activist. Bob Dylan backup player. Member of The Band. "Oh, you don't know the shape I'm in."

Wim Wenders. Director. German. Along with movies, has directed videos for U2 and Peter Cetera. Began wearing pant suits long before it was fashionable, raising eyebrows in his native Düsseldorf.

Jimmy Page. Musician. Guitarist with Led Zeppelin, group famous for its humorless approach to rock and incomprehensible lyrics. For past 50 years, has shared living expenses with woman who also claims to have lost spouse during the blitz of 1940.

REO Speedwagon (three of five members; middle guy is lead singer, Kevin Cronin and I think the guy on the right is the bass player). Musicians. One of the reasons it was okay not to have a radio in your car in the 1970s/early 1980s.